literature

soaring II

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RetroZombie's avatar
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Literature Text

soaring hawk
plunges through white sky
craving meat
Based on feedback from my good friend =MSJames I concocted an alternate version of soaring. The underlying meaning(s) are still the same - hopefully I've retained them in this version while making the surface imagery a little more interesting.

thanks for the great feedback, Mike! :)
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Iscariot-Priest's avatar
Hmm, I'm torn: this one reads better, but I like the way the earlier draft expresses the idea.

Is the underlying message that everyone's got to listen to their basic instinct, no matter what lofty creatures they are?